How to Safeguard Your Child’s Mental Health
Today’s children and teens are struggling with their mental health more than they have in the past. Recent data shows “the proportion of youth ages 11-17 who accessed screening was 9 percent higher than the average in 2019. Not only are the number of youth searching for help with their mental health increasing, but throughout the COVID-19 pandemic youth ages 11-17 have been more likely than any other age group to score for moderate to severe symptoms of anxiety and depression.” [1]
It’s no surprise that mental health issues have been on the rise for both children and adults this past year. As a parent or caregiver, it can be overwhelming and heartbreaking to see children under distress--but know that you’re not alone. Our school community recognizes this is a crucial time to pay attention to our children’s mental health and we’re right here with you. In this guide, we will navigate a straightforward guide to approach any mental health concerns you may have in your home. We will also provide some external resources to help you identify some of the concerns you may be having. So let’s dive in.
Recognize signs of stress.
The first step to take in safeguarding your child’s mental health is to recognize when something is not right. Not all signs and symptoms are the same, nor are they all-inclusive for every child or teen, however, knowing how to identify these red flags will help you figure out a plan of action.
Young children may benefit from an evaluation and treatment if they:
Have frequent tantrums or are intensely irritable much of the time
Often talk about fears or worries
Complain about frequent stomachaches or headaches with no known medical cause
Are in constant motion and cannot sit quietly (except when they are watching videos or playing video games)
Sleep too much or too little, have frequent nightmares, or seem sleepy during the day
Are not interested in playing with other children or have difficulty making friends
Struggle academically or have experienced a recent decline in grades
Repeat actions or check things many times out of fear that something bad may happen.
Older children and adolescents may benefit from an evaluation if they:
Have lost interest in things that they used to enjoy
Have low energy
Sleep too much or too little, or seem sleepy throughout the day
Are spending more and more time alone, and avoid social activities with friends or family
Fear gaining weight, or diet or exercise excessively
Engage in self-harm behaviors (e.g., cutting or burning their skin)
Smoke, drink, or use drugs
Engage in risky or destructive behavior alone or with friends
Have thoughts of suicide
Have periods of highly elevated energy and activity, and require much less sleep than usual
Say that they think someone is trying to control their mind or that they hear things that other people cannot hear. [2]
It’s fairly common to mistake your child or teen’s behavioral issues or difficulties as a stage that they’re just going through. However, it’s important to seek help when you see a change in their behaviors persisting for more than just a few weeks, especially if they begin to cause problems at school, home or with peers.
Mental Health America has an online screening questionnaire for parents to use as a tool to help them assess concerns with their child.
Teach stress management.
Stress is a normal part of life, but stress management is not necessarily taught in schools nor at home. It’s time to start thinking about ways we can introduce the proper tools to manage stress in a healthy way to our kids.
Each child is built differently, so work together with your child to find stress-relieving tactics that work for their particular needs. Play to your child’s senses: see, touch, hear, think. Playing a board game at home or reading your child’s favorite book can help relieve some mental tension they may be carrying. Relaxing activities such as breathing exercises and light physical activity can help release physical tension. Writing in a journal or sketching or painting something can be a great outlet for kids that love having a creative outlet. Playing peaceful music or letting your child freely practice their instrument can also allow them to creatively express themselves and find relief from stressors.
There are also specific techniques to help your children train their brains to manage their thoughts in a healthy way. Negative thoughts can dictate feelings of sadness, fear, frustration, loneliness or stress. For example, a teenager may think they’re going to fail this unit of US History and that thought triggers them to feel worried, which then triggers the action of not studying. Their action to not study started with the negative thought that convinced them they were bound to fail. This is a detrimental cycle of trapped thinking, but we can help our kids overcome this. This fillable worksheet works through the negative thought process and how to redirect thoughts to positive ones creating a better plan of action. My thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Take care of your mental health.
Before dissecting your child’s mental well being, it’s important to first take a look at your own mental health. If you can remember safety guidelines from airlines, they always instruct parents and caregivers to first put on their own oxygen masks before assisting children. This is because we cannot effectively help others if we ourselves are hurting or injured. The same goes for mental health. Children will naturally learn from the example of their parents. If they see their parents making healthy lifestyle decisions and drawing healthy boundaries for their well being, they will follow suit. On the flip side, when parents have untreated mental health issues, children are more likely to develop mental health problems of their own. [3]
Take the time for self-care and self-evaluation. Parents are key in setting the tone for a healthy household. In today’s world, it’s not only important to focus on eating right and exercising to take care of our bodies, but also setting mental health as a priority. Find time to mentally destress from a hard work day, incorporate a healthy social life into your schedule, and practice mindfulness or intentional quiet times to unwind and find rest for your soul. As you take care of yourself, not only will your family be able to witness a positive example of a mentally healthy person, you will be better equipped to provide support to your children or spouse when they are in need.
Get outside help.
Getting professional help can sometimes come with a stigma or denial, which is probably why statistics show that many people don’t seek out external help for mental issues. However, as we’ve addressed earlier in this post, mental issues have been on the rise globally. If you’ve come to a point where you need extra help for yourself or for your child, it’s never too early to seek outside support.
Schools are a great place to start if you have concerns for your child’s behavior. Teachers have a lot of insight on how students act while in class and with their peers. Many schools also have in-house or in-district counseling or behavioral therapy services for students. Local churches are also a great tool for parents and children and are generally free of cost. Many local churches have mentoring programs for youth, counseling services, and a variety of support groups for different needs. Seeking help from a mental health provider can also be a very effective choice for your family. Mental health providers are professionally trained in understanding and helping others navigate through mental and behavioral difficulties.
There is no shame in seeking help, especially if help is lifesaving for the recipient. Hopefully, with early intervention and a better understanding of mental health, parents will be more equipped to support their children.
There is no singular solution that fits every need, but we hope that the options we provided are helpful to you and your family.
Sources:
[1] https://www.mhanational.org/issues/state-mental-health-america#Key
[2] https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/children-and-mental-health/index.shtml
[3] Reupert AE, J maybery D, Kowalenko NM. Children whose parents have a mental illness: prevalence, need and treatment. Med J Aust. 2013;199(3 Suppl):S7-9. doi:10.5694/mja11.11200
